I wish I could punch you in the face.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
