Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
