he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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