A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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