everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Operation Purity has been aborted
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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