i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
