you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize