what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I am available for nakedness
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
