My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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