They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
