didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
