left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
