I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Randomize
