the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
