Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize