Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
