I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
