Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Randomize
