Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize
