I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Randomize
