it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
