i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.