Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Randomize
