Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
This is the high leading the old right now
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
