Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
