it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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