ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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