You really coming over, don't trick.
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I can't trust your balls anymore.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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