Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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