do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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