I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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