You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
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Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
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i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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