New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize