I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
The uberlube is also flammable
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
