a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Randomize
