Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
