I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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