There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
