So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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