i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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