How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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