Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
It's blow job season.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
