bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
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