end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
one two three fourrrrnication!
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
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he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
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Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
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