I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
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