she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
