the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
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