she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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