He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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