even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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