Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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