That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Randomize
